5 of 25. A new perspective: looking forward to more boring weekends.
5 weeks of 25 have gone by, at the speed of light; I was busy finding my own space in this colorful country, defining my work with Save the Children, building new connections, creating new routines. Today week 6 starts. It is a lazy Sunday morning. Shower, check! Second coffee, check! Online news, check! Facebook updates, check! Music, check! It’s only 10 a.m. and I’m already up, dressed, ready to do.. what? So in the tropical heat of the day, I’m facing the second toughest question on this assignment: what is most difficult for you?
The answer is hanging like a ripe fruit within the four walls of the room – facing the perspective to spend the whole day in the cosy, yet small, 5 sq m room, I realize … I’m bored. I’m craving for some action and for some kinds of freedom, which I have voluntarily given up for the next months to come. Freedom to be active on the outside without big constraints in time and space. Freedom to meet my friends for a beer. Freedom to be invisible. Freedoms so many of my fellow Pulse volunteers express they miss.
In a casual conversation with my friend I share this, asking for sympathy and comfort, you know, crying for attention. I complain: I didn’t do much.. Took coffee, some sun-bathing, took some photos on the balcony. With the camera lense managed to disturb some birds that nested next to my balcony, listened to music, then had that famous fried chicken for lunch on the open-terrace bar, took more photos, oh, look, that dental floss has a heart shape! Watched a TV show… and the day was gone. There’s nothing to do, OMG! I’m bored, I continue…
And then he interrupts me: But hey! That’s not bad at all, you did so much and still you relaxed, I would love to spend my weekend like this! I’m shocked by this perspective. One thing you must know about me is that I’m a choleric, a control freak, I need targets. I survive and feel fulfillment in being active, planning and executing my plans, in doing, doing, doing. I get excited in the smallest plans I make – buying tickets for my next holiday, looking for that surprise gift… So… the perspective that someone is appreciating my day of doing nothing at all, is a cause of discomfort and for sure, of disbelief. Of course my friend is just trying to calm me down. But then he goes on: You did so many things, and I just spent my day sleeping. Hm, ok, I have to admit it, it’s a perspective to consider… So I’ll finish this blog with a quote I’ll make the motto for all my boring weekends to come 🙂