Shaaaahhhhhh, Shaaahhhh, Shaaaahhhhh: Facing the fears
The title of my blog refers to the Mexican film: “No refunds”, produced by Gary Alazraki. This film is about facing fears, and be resilient to the challenges that life presents. In the movie, the main character learned to say, “Shaaaahhhhhh, Shaaahhhh, Shaaaahhhhh” to the the fears, in order to overcome them.
I want to talk about fear, because part of the PULSE assignment is to face some fears. First, the application, the uncertainty, and the questions that came to your mind, such as: What if they selected me?; What if I can´t do my work ?; Who is going to be working instead of me in GSK during the assignment?; What am I going to do as a volunteer if I have no experience?; and once they chose you, there are more doubts coming and anxiety. For me it was a great relief to have the PULSE training with the volunteers from Latin America, because I was able to express my feelings, desires, doubts and gather strength to undertake the mission, but it’s still not easy. Even so, the nicest thing is knowing that you will not be alone, there is a PULSE team that will be always supporting you in the country, and there is a network of people who is monitoring you and giving you feedback at all of the time (but you don´t know that at the begining).
Returning to the fears, I remembered that the meaning of my name is “the strongest” and as I´m no super strong, I have always thought that I must develop an inner strength to fulfill the purpose that I have on Earth. One evening I was in my apartment in Nicaragua, I took a pillow from the floor, hugged it and two tarantulas jumped on me. I screamed all as I can, I climbed on a table and started to throw all of the objects that I could find to the spiders. I finally killed one of the spiders and happily, one of the neighbors helped me to kill the other tarantula. It was a strange event, I might think that if my neighbor wouldn´t be there helping me, I will probably thought that it was a nightmare, because I certainly have spider phobia.
Besides the spiders, I have faced other challenges such as living on my own, being in an NGO, working in a different field than health or pharmaceutical industry, living in a country away from my family and friends, and having only six months to complete the mission for which I came. Often these “challenges” generate anxiety because I’m no longer in my comfort zone, but this reminded me that although I am not so strong, I embrace change, so the more gigantic is the spider, the faster I will react.
With this blog I want to encourage the people who are ready to apply for a PULSE assignment, to you I tell you: Forget the fears, and be part of the change, it is often not easy, but having this experience worth it! Nothing is as we imagine, but even two simple spiders can motivate you and get you to move on, so be brave and fight for this dream. I mentioned the word dream, because I think that all of the PULSE applicants must be dreamers , super passionate people, willing to out of their comfort zone during six months with the rewarding of help others and change your life. In Save the Children I’ve met valuable people, who daily teach me different things, and depending on yourself each day can be a new adventure.
When I was thinking about applying to PULSE, the first thing I did was to read the blogs, read about Save the Children, about the volunteers in Africa and I spent several nights reading and dreaming awake about my PULSE dream, I really wanted to understand about the project, there was a time that even my family read the blogs and say – “Oh Carolina, what if you are selected? And if that happens your life is going to change, because this dream will be real…”. I want to tell you that the only way to capture the PULSE essence, is to be part of the program, so go and say Shaaaahhhhhh, Shaaahhhh, Shaaaahhhhh to the fears and go for your dreams. So what are you waiting for?
Be the change!